How to Create Joy

We often think of joy as something that just happens—like a flash of sunshine on an otherwise cloudy day. But what if joy isn’t just something we stumble upon? What if it’s something we can create, gently and intentionally, even in the middle of stress, grief, or overwhelm?

In therapy, I often work with people who are doing their best to survive difficult circumstances. They’re not chasing happiness—they’re just trying to make it through. And sometimes, in that process, the idea of joy can feel almost out of reach or even frivolous.

But here’s what I remind them:

Joy is not a reward. It’s a resource.

It’s not something we earn by doing enough. It’s something we can access, even in small moments, as a way to stay connected to life and to ourselves.

Here’s how.

1. Notice What Already Feels Good

Joy doesn’t have to be big or loud. Sometimes it’s subtle—a moment that brings relief, lightness, or a sense of ease. Start by asking yourself:

• When was the last time I smiled without trying?

• What moment today made me feel a little more like myself?

Joy often hides in the ordinary. A favorite song. A warm drink. The quiet pride of finishing something small. When we slow down enough to notice, we start to uncover the joy that’s already here.

2. Engage the Senses

Our senses are powerful gateways to presence—and presence is fertile ground for joy.

• Touch: Wrap yourself in a cozy blanket. Sink into warm water.

• Sound: Put on music that lifts you. Listen to rain or birds.

• Sight: Watch the colors change at sunset. Light a candle.

• Smell: Brew coffee. Use essential oils. Open a window after it rains.

• Taste: Eat something slowly and savor it.

This isn’t about luxury—it’s about aliveness. Let your senses remind you: I’m here. I matter. This moment counts.

3. Make Space for Playfulness

When was the last time you did something just because it was fun?

Play isn’t just for children—it’s for tired adults who need to remember what it feels like to laugh or try something without pressure. Dance around the kitchen. Doodle. Try a ridiculous challenge. Sing off-key. Let yourself be a beginner.

Play invites freedom. And freedom invites joy.

4. Let Joy Coexist With Other Emotions

One of the biggest misconceptions about joy is that you have to “feel good” to feel it. The truth is, joy can sit right beside grief, stress, or anxiety. You can cry and laugh in the same breath. You can be exhausted and still feel connected.

This is what emotional flexibility looks like. It’s saying:

“Even though I’m hurting, I can still choose moments that feed my soul.”

That’s not denial. That’s resilience.

5. Create a “Joy Menu”

Some days, we’re too tired to think about what we need. That’s where a Joy Menu comes in handy.

Try making a list with three columns:

• Quick joy (1–2 mins): Stretch, text a friend, listen to one song

• Short joy (5–30 mins): Walk outside, read something inspiring, make tea

• Deep joy (1+ hour): Garden, paint, cook, connect deeply with someone you love

Then, when you’re low on motivation, pick something small—something you don’t have to earn.

Final Thought

Joy isn’t about fixing your life. It’s about feeling your life, even in little bursts.

It’s not a distraction. It’s a practice of remembering that there is still goodness available to you.

You are allowed to seek it.
You are allowed to receive it.
You are allowed to create it.

Even now. Especially now.

Contact Bee Blissful today if ant support creating space for more joy in your life? Therapy can be a place to reconnect with what makes you feel alive. Reach out if you're ready to explore that together.